I shared my heart with my Bible study group last month. Below is what I sent to them:
I've been reminiscing today looking at some old blogs I've written and am still amazed at how God has used my life over the last 14 years to help others. I'm hesitant to speak up sometimes during our Bible study "Sharing" questions for fear I may come across as trying to use our group to promote my books. But it's time I speak up.
The Lord has been tugging at my heart for the past couple of months with some of the "Sharing" questions asked in our workbook, and I feel I have stopped being obedient to what He has called me to share with others. I spent 2 years after my late husband's death writing and promoting the books where I share our testimony. I spent the next 3 years focused on co-writing a screenplay based on our experience and trying to get it produced into a film. We had a well-known actor and Christian producers willing to do it, but my co-writer and I would have to come up with the funding ourselves (an estimated $14 million in 2021), so I became discouraged and told the Lord if He wanted this film made, He would have to bring the funding to us. It didn't happen. I felt like I had failed God.
It was during this time (COVID pandemic) that I lost my momentum and began craving to find love again and get married. I’d been in two relationships that didn’t work out. In January 2022, I asked God to give me a break from His work and prayed for Him to bring the right man into my life. Less than two months later, I met my current husband, and I put everything else on the back burner.
Now that God gave me that time of rest I needed, I've really been feeling a tug on my heart--especially after listening last week to the interview with Dallas Jenkins regarding "The Chosen" series--to start sharing my testimony again to small groups. In Dallas’ interview, host Allie Beth Stuckey said, "God is going to multiply how He wants to multiply (fishes and loaves). That's not the point--the point is not the result. The point is obedience. God is going to get glory through our obedience whether it ends in what we call failure or what we call success."
My co-writer has started another rewrite of our script--and I'm dragging my feet getting involved again because of the time and energy--and lack of funding--involved. But I'm feeling the Lord prompting me again through our workbook to do SOMETHING!
Here are the workbook questions and my answers I wrote in:
How are you bold about sharing Christ? I published my late husband's blog and my book about how God's love carried us through the cancer journey and beyond. I need to start doing book signings and share my testimony to small groups again.
Have you ever neglected to heed what God has placed on your heart? To promote my books and produce the film that will give Him glory.
When have you felt the cost of discipleship in your life? How did it impact your relationship with Christ? Being a shining light to others during Chris' cancer journey and afterward. I spent 2 solid years writing and promoting our books and another 3 years writing our screenplay and trying to find a producer. It brought me much closer to Christ than any other time in my life.
What can you do to encourage others to know God's revealed truth? Share my testimony through my books and in person.
Can you think of a specific conversation when only the Holy Spirit could have equipped you with the words you spoke? It wasn't a "conversation," but the Lord definitely equipped me in writing my book. I thought I had agreed to write a book for caregivers regarding my late husband's cancer journey. But it turned out to be something different--it was my testimony about how God's love carried us through the difficult times and about our faith and how it grew through our fiery trials. The Holy Spirit definitely equipped me to write His story--the one He wanted told. [I'd never had any ambition or experience to be an author, and I truly felt His Spirit guiding me as I wrote.]
I've never been eloquent and am "slow of speech" like Moses, yet God chose to use me. I wanted to share my testimony with you through a radio interview I did back in 2018. I was terrified to do this interview and turned down the invitation to speak the first time, but then I was talked into doing it. You can probably hear my voice trembling.... My interview segment is about 25 minutes long.
Here's another radio interview I did that has video as well as audio. My confidence was a little better here, but I was still very nervous.
https://www.facebook.com/ChristianLiteraryAwards/videos/173179343584034/
Below is a blog I wrote in 2018 about God's Timetable and Sense of Humor. At the bottom of the blog is a television video of my interview with Mike Doocy on Fox 4 News. (This was another time when the Holy Spirit equipped me with the words to speak because I was naive and didn't expect to be FILMED!)
https://hagabooksoffaith.com/blog/2018/7/11/gods-timetable-and-sense-of-humor
If you're interested, below are a couple of video interviews of my son Chad talking about the horrific "accident" I mentioned where he was hit head on by a car while on a training bike ride in Spain. He was airlifted to a hospital with neck and facial injuries. He is a living miracle.
Thank you for allowing me to share my heart and my testimony.
I've spoken before to a cancer group at a hospital, a GriefShare group, a widow’s group, a home fellowship group, an elderly church group, and a book club. If you know of a particular group that would like to hear my testimony, please let me know.
Thank you.