After my husband died, I couldn’t wait to attend a GriefShare class because I wanted to start dealing with my grief in the best way possible as soon as I could. After his death, I attended two full semesters of GriefShare.* No, I didn’t fail the class the first time, and I didn’t see it as a weakness to attend a second time. I saw it as a sign of strength because I wanted to do everything in my power to help me through my grief. Plus, I wanted to make sure I didn’t miss anything in case I was in a fog the first time. I also wanted to see how far I had progressed. Here are some tips that may help you work through your own grief.
Where Am I Now? How Did I Get Here?
Now that we are starting a new year, I’ve decided it’s time to look back and reflect on the five and a half years since Chris died on 6/25/2016. Where am I now? How did I get here?
It hasn’t always been an easy road, but much easier than I anticipated because of the help I have received along the way—not only from family, long-time friends, and new friends—but especially with God’s guidance.
I lost more than just a husband when Chris died. I lost my best friend, my confidante, provider, lover, advisor, spiritual leader, companion, encourager, inspiration, errand runner, driver, handyman, cook, chore helper, yard worker, support system, and bug killer. I remember the first time I had to capture a gecko that found its way into the house, I broke down and cried. That was Chris’ job to get rid of unwanted creatures. Even the simple things that Chris always handled like checking the car’s tire pressure or replacing the battery in the garage door keypad had me in tears. (I didn’t know the thing even ran on batteries.)
Counting Blessings
Imerman Angels is an international program that recruits mentors to provide emotional support for cancer patients and their caregivers, matching them with someone going through the same type of cancer and treatment. I signed up to be a Mentor Angel and was matched in 2014 with Kay in Colorado. We talked fairly often by email and sometimes by phone.
“How do you fight depression?” she asked one day.